The 12 Days of Pirates

(Composed by Finn & Eli)

On the first day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: a parrot sitting on me.

On the second day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the third day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the fourth day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the fifth day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: FIIIIIIVE TREEEAAAASURE CHESTS!
Four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the sixth day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: six captain's hats, FIIIIIIVE TREEEAAAASURE CHESTS! Four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the seventh day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: seven evil curses, six captain's hats, FIIIIIIVE TREEEAAAASURE CHESTS! Four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the eighth day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: eight sharks a-swimming, seven evil curses, six captain's hats, FIIIIIIVE TREEEAAAASURE CHESTS! Four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the ninth day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: nine mateys fighting, eight sharks a-swimming, seven evil curses, six captain's hats, FIIIIIIVE TREEEAAAASURE CHESTS! Four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the tenth day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: ten British soldiers, nine mateys fighting, eight sharks a-swimming, seven evil curses, six captain's hats, FIIIIIIVE TREEEAAAASURE CHESTS! Four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the eleventh day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: eleven cannon balls, ten British soldiers, nine mateys fighting, eight sharks a-swimming, seven evil curses, six captain's hats, FIIIIIIVE TREEEAAAASURE CHESTS! Four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

On the twelfth day of Christmas a pirate gave to me: twelve eye patches, eleven cannon balls, ten British soldiers, nine mateys fighting, eight sharks a-swimming, seven evil curses, six captain's hats, FIIIIIIVE TREEEAAAASURE CHESTS! Four Jolly Rogers, three peg legs, two golden swords and a parrot sitting on me.

Repeat. Again and again. 

Yep. 

The Twilight Monster

My 7yo has started writing plays and storyboards as a hobby. I have no idea why he started doing this, but it has become all-encompassing for him. Most of his plays have swashbuckling knight-pirate-ninjas that battle epic monsters and face multiverses of adversity before they save the princess or find hordes of treasure.

His resources are limited, so he usually casts his brother as the dashing lead, with myself & Hotwheel Hubs as supporting characters and extras. I also usually provide catering. I'm not kidding when I say working with him can be grueling - he demands perfect performances from his cast and his rehearsals are often and brutal.

Without further ado, here's a sample of his latest production, The Twilight Monster.

Cover Art, which really has nothing to do with actual storyline.

VILLAGER (played by Mom)
Quick! The Twilight Monster has escaped! 

He did confess he was so busy with the story board he wrote the play in "actor language". 

BRAVE KNIGHT (as played by his brother)
Never fear! The Knight will save your life! 

WISE KING (as played by Dad)
Whoever saves my Princess will be the ruler of the kingdom!

I think that's the king's arms folded. Unless he also cross-dresses.  Also, he is a Pisces.

THE TWILIGHT MONSTER (as played by Finn)
RRROOOAAAAAARRRR!!! You will never get her back! 

The TM is kind of Beelzebulby. 

Now, it's important to note these are just storyboards the dictator director hands out to his cast. He draws four sets of these, all alike, so we can rehearse our lines. Then he goes back and illustrates a master storyboard with color (and correct spelling upon insistance of the catering crew) to refer to when he starts shooting.

I really need to get this kid into drama classes.

Comic Debut

So this was Finn's first attempt at a comic panel. Not too shabby. 

Rocking the Vote

Today was primary election day, and I took the boys into our polling place while I voted so they could see democracy at work. They had some questions about what was going on and it started a discussion about voting, leaders, community, and citizenship. All good things, right?

Me: "So, when you get old enough, you should always go vote for who you want to be the leaders of your community. It's important."

5yo: "What's community mean?"

Me: "It's means your neighborhood. Where you live and go to school, and all the other people that live around you."

7yo: "Yeah, and you should vote for the President. AND the Mayor."

Me: "That's right! You guys have met the Mayor before - remember him?"

7yo: "Yeah..." (Suddenly huffy.) "We need to talk to him. He's not doing a good job lately."

Me: "Wha? What do you mean? What makes you think that?"

7yo: "That dead possum is still by the road and stinkin. We can't even walk to the park! That guy needs to go get that thing."

Me: "I'll be sure to let him know."

Also, I wrote a post over at Rocket City Mom about our school struggles. I didn't get into the grisly details too much there and I won't here, but it was a nerve-wracking post to write. Luckily it was received pretty well and started a good discussion on boys and the different ways they learn. Generally, our education system needs an overhaul.

I wish I could've voted on that today.

Where We've Been

For the handful of folks wondering, no, we have not joined the Witness Protection Program. In between basketball, swimming, laundry, and other boy-wrangling, I'm writing over at the parenting blog Rocket City Mom and posting about our adventures on my Facebook page. Posting here seems redundant but I've got to do better, guilt-free blogging or not.

Quickie updates:

Finn is playing basketball for the third time and got his first triple-double during a game. He's learning to read and we are really enjoying his new school. His favorite Christmas gift was a scooter. He loves telling jokes, Legos, Mario Cart, and jigsaw puzzles. He's currently working on the 550 piece kind.

Eli was visited by the Tooth Fairy three times this month and is a snaggle-puss. His favorite gift was a samurai castle, and he's playing basketball for the very first time this year. He really loves swimming and we're anticipating the next set of lessons. He also loves ninjas, (toy) swords of all kinds, and red-headed girls. Try as we might it has been difficult to dissuade him from the latter.

Hotwheel Husband just finished school and is starting on the next degree, all after he gets home from a full day at work. I'm insanely lucky proud of him.

I'm doing this. And this. And helping my sister with her dance studio. And volunteering at the public library, and working on the Madison Street Festival. And some other stuff that would probably bore you.

Happy New Year and Roll Tide.

Diving Boards & Delayed Reactions

So... hello! I'm so glad I aspire to the guilt-free blogging mentality, or else I would be racked with guilt over how I haven't posted in eons. Let's get caught up shall we?

Bad news first.

On April 27 we huddled in our bathroom, as did countless other Alabamians, while the tornadoes raged outside. We were SO LUCKY that our home only had minor cosmetic damage and no one in our family was hurt. Other friends weren't so lucky. Our neighbors are still picking up the pieces of what the storm left, and it's almost two months later. My dear friend Sarah Lena wrote about it here, as did Rocket City Mom.

The boys and Hotwheel Hubs were all home when one of the tornadoes circling overhead swirled past our house, never touching down but causing damage to our house and trees. The sound was pretty scary and this previously storm-fearless girl is a lot more wary when the weather alerts happen now. The laundry list of wind damage:

- snapped our basket ball goal clean in two

- zigzag-bent gutters

- tree fell on our fence & back deck

- tons of shingle & roof damage

- picked up our garbage can and bashed it against the garage door

- 8 out 16 shutters MIA

- cracks in brick mortar

- damage to Hubs' car from loose roof shingles

Some of our neighbors on our street were hit even harder, and this was just a tornado that never touched down! Others mere miles down the road weren't as lucky.

We were at home without power for seven days. Despite the fear and the sadness and the worry, the technology break was nice. We played with our neighbors, visited friends, cooked food on the grill, helped with the recovery effort, and generally reconnected. I still hear people talk about how they were a bit disappointed when the power came back on, but oh-so-happy to take a hot shower.

The boys and I volunteered at the public library a few days after the storm. They were offering free wifi and their entire bank of computers for people to check on their families and make calls to FEMA and insurance companies. Most people just wanted a break, some air conditioning, some books to read. Everyone wanted to talk. It was library therapy. I was so proud of Finn - he reshelved two entire carts of children's picture books that the library had backlogged since the storms - all by himself.

Now on to Happier News.

School Play!

Finn was a Who in his school's production of "Seussical the Musical". A star is born!

Team Sports!

Eli apparently has knack for all things running, kicking, and jumping. Who knew?

VBS and Lost Teeth!

Tooth total: Finn, 5 / Eli, 1

School's out and I'm home with the beastie boys 24/7. Summer has hit us with a vengeance (90+ degrees for over 20 days straight here!) and we're spending lots of time at the pool. Then this happened...

He didn't even TELL me he was going to do this. I looked up and THERE HE WAS, on the diving board!

I've decided this is the "summer of sampling" and we're trying bite-sized versions of swimming, soccer, basketball, Irish step dancing (Finn), martial arts, dance camp, and theater. Then the boys can pick what they like best and we'll do that after school starts. I want them good and exhausted at the end of the day.

I'm also doing some freelance PR & marketing and volunteering around town when I can. Idle hands are boring. And somehow satanic so I've heard. So there's that.

Run for the Hills, Dorothy!

It's Tornado Season in the South, and the usual springtime severe weather alerts are in full force. Today is no different, and it's spring break to boot, so I pulled out the big guns to entertain Eli and a playmate.

Homemade Play-dough.

It's the easiest stuff in the world to make, and you probably have most of it in your pantry already. Plus it's pretty safe if you have a little one that likes to snack on play-dough.

2 cups flour, any kind will do

2 cups warm water

1 cup salt

1 TBS cream of tartar (for elasticity)

2 TBS vegetable oil

food coloring - I used the liquid kind you use for Easter eggs

fragrant essential oils - totally optional

Mix all of the ingredients except for food coloring & oils o LOW in a pot on the stovetop. Stir gently. It will start to thicken up pretty quickly. When the dough pulls away from the sides of the pot and starts to clump up, you're on the right track. Stir until you reach the desired consistency and it isn't so sticky.

Turn out the hot dough onto a clean surface or mat and let it cool for about 2 minutes, or until it's cool enough to knead. Knead the dough a few minutes until smooth, then divide it up into balls. Make a hole or indentation in the dough ball and drop in a few drops of the food coloring. Fold the dough over and start working in the dye - be careful to not touch the actual liquid dye until it works in a bit or you'll have technicolor hands! Keep adding color until you get the color you want.

Store it in an airtight container. If it dries out a bit, just knead in a few drops of warm water to soften it up. If it gets soggy, just re-heat it a bit and it will firm up.

You can also bake it in the oven to make hardened ornaments and sculpture figures. You can paint them & decorate them too!

Or just use your new play-dough as a disguise to get into fool your friends, rob a bank, or get into the hottest night club.